From His Kitchen to Yours

How is this even possible?

So this new remix of Fat Joe's Make It Rain features R. Kelly and TI (sorry kids, couldn't find the mp3). And you know... it's alright... but it made me really curious about this disorder that I'm convinced I have. I consulted with a friend who is a psychiatry student and she couldn't come up with a name for my problem, but I'm certain that it does exist and that it must have a name -- since it doesn't effect my life that much I've never bothered to really focus on it. The problem is that sometimes I have problems distinguishing my dreams from my reality. Like -- 3 years ago I had this dream that R. Kelly was video taped pissing on a 13 year old girl and the video was released and the future of his career was seriously in jeopardy. The dream was pretty elaborate -- Dave Chappelle even made an appearance on a dream-based version of his show and had a joke about the incident where R. Kelly was singing a song called "Piss On You." For the last 3-years I've been convinced that this actually happened, but then today I start listening to this track and during the chorus I hear R. Kelly singing, "I make it rain/I make it rain/I make it rain on these hoes" and my reality snaps into focus and I realize that I'm so fucked up and this disorder has really gone too far. Yes, I have dreams about R. Kelly pissing on 13 year old girls and then believe that they are real. Fuck.

Also -- I hate the way Lil' Wayne talks out the side of his already crooked ass mouth.

Big Ups 2007 - Brother Ali Drrrrrrops

Brother Ali's first release in 2003 was fah sure one of my favorite albino hip-hop releases of the last five years. The Brother straight up rocks the mic like I flow ridiculous blog entries. When Rhymesayers and the rest of the local outlets started hyping a 2007 Ali release my pants started to tighten. I couldn't wait. So today is the end of that wait.... new tracks... new album.... and it is everything I hoped for. From the curtains to the carpets the beats and the words inspired me to post a blog entry. These tracks are so fly that you need a swatter. (Damn I'm good.)

• Brother Ali - Truth Is
• Brother Ali - Lookin' At Me Sideways

Also -- could one of you loyal readers that loves me oh-so-much buy me this?

Just for Stu

I may only have one reader, but he is loyal. I receive comments from him on a regular basis and he usually chides me for my lack of updates. You see -- Stuart has nothing better to do with his time then try and beat me up over not keeping my blog regularly updated. Is it because of this that Stuart is a loser, or is the fact that he's a loser responsible for his comments?

Here is what we do know:

Stuart is very fond of Xtina, Nelly, Staind and Gwen Stefani. (Which would explain why he reads a music blog like this one... sheeesh.... ) Stuart is hung like a "long horse." Stuart is consistently irritating. Stuart is the only reason I even update this damn site.... well... and the chicks.